Sunday 22 March 2009

Weight matters

Mrs. Reed occupied her usual seat by the fireside; she made a signal to me to approach; I did so, and she introduced me to the stony stranger with the words: "This is the little girl respecting whom I applied to you."  _He_, for it was a man, turned his head slowly towards where I stood, and having examined me with the two inquisitive-looking grey eyes which twinkled under a pair of bushy brows, said solemnly, and in a bass voice, "Her size is small: what is her age?"  "Ten years."  "So much?" was the doubtful answer; and he prolonged his scrutiny for some minutes.  Presently he addressed me--"Your name, little girl?"  "Jane Eyre, sir."  In uttering these words I looked up: he seemed to me a tall gentleman; but then I was very little; his features were large, and they and all the lines of his frame were equally harsh and prim.  "Well, Jane Eyre, and are you a good child?"  Impossible to reply to this in the affirmative: my little world held a contrary opinion: I was silent.  Mrs. Reed answered for me by an expressive shake of the head, adding soon, "Perhaps the less said on that subject the better, Mr. Brocklehurst."  "Sorry indeed to hear it! she and I must have some talk;" and bending from the perpendicular, he installed his person in the arm-chair opposite Mrs. Reed's.  "Come here," he said.  I stepped across the rug; he placed me square and straight before him. What a face he had, now that it was almost on a level with mine! what a great nose! and what a mouth! and what large prominent teeth!  "No sight so sad as that of a naughty child," he began, "especially a naughty little girl.  Do you know where the wicked go after death?"  "They go to hell," was my ready and orthodox answer.  "And what is hell?  Can you tell me that?"  "A pit full of fire."  "And should you like to fall into that pit, and to be burning there for ever?"  "No, sir."

6 comments:

  1. Sounds familiar. I had a psychiatrist after firstshrink. She was the one who got me on a mood stabiliser, and i remember a conversation we had about drinking.

    She asked me if I was still drinking heavily now I was feeling stable and I said no, because I didn't feel the need to. (Pre-anorexia relapse so it wasn't a calorie thing!) And she made a very valid point being that the medication I was on just wasn't working before, so I used something which was working for me. Like any port in a storm, self medicating has it's place in reality. It's not a healthy choice and it doesn't solve problems long term, but personally in light of another solution coming up I don't see the harm in a few drinks to take the edge off. So long as it isn't worsening your low mood, or causing you problems like poor judgement and being in dangerous situations.

    Most people drink a great deal at Uni, but they do it as a means to an end, not to block out the bad stuff. I think the problem arises when you stop trying to work out the bad stuff, and rely on drinking it away.

    Lola x

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am still trying to work on the bad stuff, so I guess that's good at least, but my drinking has started to get me into bad situations and results in me having very poor judgement whenever I drink. I wake up in other people's houses, usually guys' houses, with no idea of what I did the night before or how I ended up there. It's only happened a few times but I know that's still not good.
    Thanks for sharing though, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who's tried to self medicate with alcohol! x

    ReplyDelete
  3. As Lola mentioned, "it's only when you stop trying to work out the bad stuff...", wow, i hope she is right. i see her as very wise, somehow. i know i am drinking too much lately, but it's hard to work on a relationship when husband comes home and barely speaks...and falls asleep. Yep, i am self medicating with wine.....but still trying so hard to work out all the bad stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  4. However, please be careful, Hannah, okay???

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi, me again! About the weight, that, too is such an issue with me. Usually i have coffee in the morning, then don't eat during the day...then comes the wine and crackers...and supper...guess i am trying to "save calories" for the evening. Not very healthy.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes the weight thing is really annoying, I just need to keep exercising I guess, make good use of my gym membership!

    ReplyDelete